Friday, March 26, 2010

fatigued

Sometimes I get annoyed with God and how awesome He is at growing me. I just get tired...exhausted would be more appropriate.
But I am still thankful.
And I know it is "good" for me. Not "good" in a sarcastic sense like, 'it will eventually make me happy,' but "good" in a literal sense like, 'it might be hard but I am ultimately happy RIGHT NOW.'
I love how incredibly important relationships are in life. Without them I sort of fall apart.
It is also amazing to me how incredibly hard relationships can be. But the hard is worth the work. It makes sense that you need to work at things that are so important.



A friend of mine was talking about his "burden" to create music - and his need to experience highs and lows in life in order to write a song that will bring truth and peace to a person - to set them free. In reading about this I thought, what is my burden? How would I define my God-given "burden" in life? So, I am thinking on it - and will get back to you shortly after I attempt to define it :)

EDIT: My Burden:
People are my burden. I desire to know each person deeply. As impossible as that is, I strive for it and even excel at it (at times). It creates meaningful relationships. It creates times of being stretched too thin. Relationships take time and effort, and as much as I love giving both of those things – I only have so much. So for me, the down side is that I get close to too many and don’t have enough time/energy to effectively manage all of these relationships. The upside, my relationships are not dull or surface level. I get to experience the trueness of who people are. I get to know hearts and lives that God has created so SO beautifully. People are my burden. And for that burden I am so grateful!

2 comments:

  1. Jess - I relate 100% with this blog. I will be praying for renewed strength after this time or stretching and growing. I love you!! I cant wait to get home so we can invest in each other and learn how God has grown each of us! :-) You are so special and important to me!

    ReplyDelete
  2. i love that you love people. you are so a ... wonderful friend. wonderful doesn't even cover it. neither does great. or super. or awesome. but you are all of those things.

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